by Brian
Warriner
Domestic violence, also known as intimate partner
violence, is defined as the abuse of your boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, or
someone you are in an intimate relationship with. This can also be with someone
you share a house or an apartment with. Abuse is not just limited to physical,
but it also includes emotional, mental, spiritual, financial, and various other
ways. No matter the form of the abuse, it still leaves a lasting effect. Domestic
violence can also happen to children.
Now, when people hear domestic violence, they think of
men abusing their wives. However, they overlook that domestic violence can be
wives abusing their husbands, or girlfriends abusing their boyfriends or their
girlfriends. Domestic violence is not limited to straight couples and men
against women. It can hit everyone, whether you are in a same-sex relationship,
with someone who is non-binary or gender nonconforming. You rarely hear about
domestic violence against men. According to the statistics, 1 in 5 men have experienced
domestic violence. 36% of men experience some form of domestic violence, 85%
experienced domestic violence felt lonely and isolated, while 1 in 4 endured
severe physical violence (Legal Guide, 2026).
I am reminded by personal stories of loved ones who
experienced domestic violence. However, I will not share those for private
reasons. However, I recall an episode of Designing Women in which Charlene’s
cousin moved to Atlanta. She agreed to teach the girls to dance for a talent
show where they would sing a song by the Supremes. After rehearsal, her cousin’s
husband came home. After the girls left, Charlene entered the house to hear
about the abuse her cousin had endured. It was beyond verbal but physical
abuse. She talked to her cousin about leaving her husband, and she will help
them. To meet her at the talent show. She showed up while the girls were on the
stage performing their number (Turner, 1989).
Another story: I remember from the show Roseanne when
Jackie’s boyfriend, Fischer, hit her. Jackie showed up at Roseanne’s house
while in the bathroom, and Darlene walked in on Jackie. Who saw the bruises on
her back, she told Roseanne. Jackie reluctantly told her what happened. The ex-boyfriend
pressed assault charges against Dan, and he was sent to jail. The next day,
Jackie moved out of his apartment. That is when Roseanne finds out that it was
not the first time. It ended with Jackie and Fischer breaking up (Weyman, 1993).
The physical issues that come with domestic violence are
physical injuries, which can be caused by another person or self-inflicted due
to domestic violence. As well as chronic health issues, reproductive health
issues, substance abuse, sleep disturbances, and headache and migraines (Smith,
2023). Which can have lasting effects on your mental state. There are also mental
disorders that can last, such as depression, anxiety, and PTSD (Smith, 2023). One
may also deal with problems with trust and intimacy, self-injury, and suicidal
thoughts, and one may even become isolated from society (Smith, 2023).
The darker side of domestic violence is that one may
have difficulty forming relationships and friendships, loss of agency,
childhood social development, community ostracism, employment, and professional
difficulties. Domestic violence can cause them to call out frequently or miss
appointments because of the bruises and the depression that accompany domestic
violence (Pederson, 2024). It is because of this that not many employers will
understand your situation. They may use it as a reason to fire someone. All
this can lead to further issues that can come from being in a domestic violence
situation.
This blog post will be part of a series of posts. It
focuses on domestic violence or intimate partner violence. We will highlight
domestic violence in same-sex relationships, and dive deeper into ways to
combat domestic violence and how to seek help if you are in that kind of
situation. If you are or someone you
know who is dealing with domestic violence situation, please report the
situation to the local law enforcement, once and for the last time. Do not let others
dictate to you or believe that their thoughts will change. Because remember, a
tiger will never change their stripes.
References
Legal
Guides. (2026, February 26). One in Five Men in the US Suffer from
Domestic Abuse Each Year. Legal Guides.
https://legalguides.net/one-in-five-men-in-the-us-suffer-from-domestic-abuse-each-year/
Trainer, D. (1989, October
30). Designing Women (Season 4 Episode 6) [Review of Designing
Women]. CBS.
Weyman, A. (1993, January 12). Roseanne (Season
5 Episode 14) [Television Show Roseanne]. ABC.
Smith, S. (2023,
August 6). 7 Adverse Effects of Domestic Violence on Mental Health Marriage
Advice - Expert Marriage Tips & Advice. https://www.marriage.com/advice/domestic-violence-and-abuse/effects-of-domestic-violence-on-mental-health/
Pedersen,
T. (2024 March 26). The Effects of Domestic Violence. Psych
Central. https://psychcentral.com/health/understanding-the-effects-of-domestic-violence#mental-health-impacts
CDC.
(2024, May 16). About Intimate Partner Violence. Intimate Partner
Violence Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/intimate-partner-violence/about/index.html
Office
on Women's Health. (2024, December 6). Effects of domestic violence on
children. Www.womenshealth.gov. https://womenshealth.gov/relationships-and-safety/domestic-violence/effects-domestic-violence-children
.jpg)
.jpg)